Terms and Conditions

Number 1: We're really not bad people, but with all this litigation going on we need to protect ourselves. So you agree that you have read and agree to abide by our Terms and Conditions and our Privacy Policy. If you don't agree to play by our rules, you are trespassing on our site, please go surf somewhere else.

Number 2: We don't care where you are in the world, or in space for that matter, if you're viewing EVTV1 then as far as we're concerned, and as far as the law is concerned, you're surfing from within the friendly confines of Cook County, Illinois, USA.

Number 3: There is something offensive to everyone on EVTV1 and we recommend that no one should view anything on EVTV1. So if you get all tight in the pants because of something you saw on our site, you cannot blame us, go surf somewhere else..

Number 4: We have bills to pay and so there are few ads on our site. Don't be an idiot and click on some ad and then be surprised that you're no longer at EVTV1. We have no responsibility where you end up when you click on an ad on our site. Talk to the advertiser.

Number 5: You are an individual visiting EVTV1 for your own personal enjoyment. If you're trying to reverse engineer our site, a lawyer from SNL, or some other person who is doing any sort of work, then you do not have permission to view our site and we wish you would go away.

Number 6: Look, we actually have to pay some people for our content. So everything on our site is copyrighted to us, or to us by license. Either way, you cannot use it in any way for any reason. Same goes for any Trademarks that may appear on the site.

Number 7: You cannot sue us for any reason whatsoever. You use EVTV1 totally at your own risk. See #4. We're telling you that really really bad things may happen. We don't care if your retinas fall out, you've been warned. If you think you're going to be cute and sue us, then after we get the suit dismissed we get to take your house and use it as a home for stray dogs. No really, it's a you pay us, we don't pay you situation.

Number 8: Governments all over are freaking out lately thinking there may be secret messages hidden in clip of the lady making a fruitcake. So if you're someplace other than Cook County, Illinois USA, then you cannot view our site.

Number 9: Where we are the producer of any content, we know that all models, actors, whatever, are over the age of 18. Where we are not the producer of the content, we have been told on good faith and believe that all models, actors, whatever are over the age of 18. If you're some sicko we suggest that you turn yourself in to the FBI.

Number 10: This site contains trademarks and copyrighted works of Sony Pictures Home Entertainment Inc. or its affiliated companies. All are used with permission. (c) 2006 Sony Pictures Home Entertainment Inc. All Rights Reserved.

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